An appeal from the mother-in-law

my beautifull daughters-in-law, must you fight all the time? your driving my sunshine to his grave!I sent him to marry you and this is the thanks I get?

Rivkah

P.S.Also, what's this invented nonsense about me being destined to marry Eisav? When in the Torah do you see cousins being matched up that way?

To whom did you think we planned to marry Eisav off? To the girls around the corner? To the daughter of my no-good hunter brother-in-law? If only Eisav had married one of the daughters of my civilized town-dweller brother, maybe he, too, would have gone into livestock. Marrying a cousin worked out for me.

Your loving shvigger,

Logic from Leah

Zeidy Avrohom married his niece. Our schver Yitzchok married his first cousin once removed. Accordingly, us two sisters would marry our two male cousins, no?

No. Yaakov should have married his neice or his first cousin once removed. And Yishmael, and Nachor didn't marry cousins, so why would Esav?

Leah

PS: See even our MIL says I am beautiful, and that's after SIX count em SIX sons!!!

Here comes Hagar

And Yishmael, and Nachor didn't marry cousins, so why would Esav?

What, do you think I would have married off my successful, handsome hunter son to an Egyptian commoner?

Hagar, Princess of Egypt

...and she gets smacked down

There you go again Hagar, with your haughty attitude. Who said you were a princess? You sure didn't look like a princess scrubbing my floors!!

Sarah

Rachel asks

>I sent him to marry you and this is the thanks I get?

WHO?WHO?

You sent him to marry who?!? [Hint: Me]

Rachel

Leah answers

>I sent him to marry you and this is the thanks I get?You sent him to marry who?!?

ME!!!!! ME ME ME

Leah

Rivkah reveals all

well, at first I thought asaiv might have benifited from sweet leah. however by the time he was about 40 i'm not exactly sure i would have entrusted him with a dog, much less my beloved neice

Rivkah

...and gets her head bitten off

Beloved neice? You never called. You never wrote. I got zip from you at holiday time. You didn't even show up at the wedding! And now I'm "beloved?"

Too little too late, MIL.

Leah

Lavan: "I had no choice!"

didn't that swindler yaakov buy the bride when he baught the esav's rights?I had to give leah to him!

lavan

Why she missed the wedding

travel was expensive dearie, besides I can't stand my wretched brother.

Rivkah